I was morbidly obese for 30 years. I yo-yo’d up and down. I tried all the trend/fad/hype diets. Until I figured out why I over-ate my results were always going be temporary. Forcing myself to eat less without addressing why I wanted to eat in the first place didn’t solve my problem. The urge to eat remained. One ticket for the diet roller coaster, please.
We make obesity mean so many things because of cultural norms, gender-bias, historical ideals, misogyny, hypocritical double-standards, and societal expectations that are literally impossible to reach. This creates women like me. I didn’t see how poisoned my mind had become against me, and how far reaching it was into every single aspect of my life. Back then I didn’t understand that it wasn’t my body causing my problem.
I truly thought it was my weight that made me feel terrible. My weight had nothing to do with it. Zero. In truth, I felt terrible because of what I thought I was supposed to feel, supposed to want, and supposed to think. I created my own misery based on what I was taught to believe, and those beliefs prevented any permanent weight loss.
I couldn’t see the feedback-loop I was trapped in.
I agonized over food. I was obsessed. I begged for reassurance. I was waiting for the world to give me permission to live. The eating was merely a symptom of a much, much, larger problem; how I let myself exist in the world. Or rather, how I prevented myself from existing. My life consisted of figuring out which piece of myself I needed to barter for approval. I was over-consuming to buffer, and the buffering was slowly consuming me. I was at a breaking point when I found life coaching. What I learned gave me a whole new understanding of myself and the world. It moved me so much I went on to get certified in addition to my nursing degree. People need to know about this. I wish I had known 30 years ago. I am a Licensed Practical Nurse, and now I am also a Practical Nurse Coach.
The most important thing I needed to understand is that all of my previous attempts at losing weight failed for the same reason. They did not address WHY I over-ate. Most weight-loss programs focus solely on the food, or rather, the lack thereof. Eat less. Simple, right? Um. No.
This is true for any health issue, not just weight-loss, and I see it everyday as a nurse. People want to feel better. They want to change. They don’t understand why they struggle, and they don’t always know what to do to stop the behavior that is hurting them, no matter how deeply they want it. Most people have no idea WHY they do what they do and it’s not their fault. We simply aren’t taught anything about it. To make matters worse, healthcare providers are under ever increasing pressure to see more patients in less time. As a nurse, I want nothing more than to sit down and understand a patient’s story. I want to support them through whatever obstacles and issues prevent their success. Understanding how our brains were designed to work is key when it comes to understanding our own behavior. When we learn why we do the things we do, we realize why we’ve struggled before, but understanding takes time.
When I started offering Nurse Care Coaching sessions in the clinic, the changes in the patients I coached were mind-blowing. They lost weight, processed anxiety, resolved pre-diabetes, felt better, let go of stress, and took themselves BACK. This work is real. The power that comes with understanding your why is the most life changing step you can take. Period. It is the same work that helped me take control of my own life.
Since I can’t see everyone in the clinic, I decided to open up my nurse coaching practice and offer this work here, to you. If this speaks to you, then you are ready to start managing your brain. Click below to learn more.